Jenn Martinelli Blogging in Boston

Hey, this is pretty dumb, but I can't help myself. Check out this picture of a pleated skirt on sale on Gap's website. I have those shoes! Aren't I stylish? Now Rob will post a comment about how he hates the shoes. We can't agree on shoes most of the time, only sneakers sometimes.

My old radio userland site is going to be going away soon and I didn't want to lose these, so here's a whole wealth of Rob Reed quotes:

1/25/03: "I'm an idiot. I like everything."

9/12/03: "People are gorillas who put on clothes and watch TV."

9/14/03: "When you're young, you make plans. When you're old, you make compromises."

9/15/03: "Good, go live somewhere else. South Africa needs some dogs." (to Billy)

9/16/03: "We aren't raising kids right. People are either horribly repressed like me, or they're obnoxious fuckjobs who think the world is their toilet."

9/18/03: "I could give a shit less whether 100,000 parents lock their kids in the car to let them boil to death when tens of millions of parents stand by while their kids' brains are neglected... ...We should give awards to the ones who are shooting each other because at least it shows that they have some initiative to go out and accomplish something."

9/19/03: "I'm not saying two wrongs make a right, I'm just saying that some people need to be beaten upside the head until they're coughing up blood."

9/22/03: "I can't think of a scenario where the worst part of the experience wouldn't be the people involved."

9/23/03: "How did it happen that all of our greatest philosophers today came to write for cartoons?"

9/26/03: "Everyone is a mini-celebrity in their own mind."

10/20/03: "I'm not paranoid. I know the score. You're against me like everyone else."

10/13/03: "Too much of my genius has been lost."

That Rob Reed. He's quite a guy.

I'm listening to this story on NPR right now. It's very interesting. Crazy evangelical lunatics should listen to it or read this guy's book. Before you do, please take your crazy pills so the sane part of your brain can actually absorb the information about how the bible is actually a re-re-re-re-reinterpretation of the original text and that scribes edited it somewhat freely and added and removed things at will in many cases.

Look how cool the stuff is here. I love stuff like the test tube holder as a pen and pencil holder, the aluminum house numbers, the cable turtle, the marble paper clips, and lots of other stuff. I haven't been to the store in Cambridge... that's probably a good thing. But I like to stare at the cool things online.

In case you had any doubt somehow, despite the sub 20-degree temperatures around here lately, it is, for all intents and purposes, winter.

For all you crazy evangelist nutjobs out there who feel it's your duty to once again enforce your beliefs on everyone else in the country, let me review some things for you.

What Christmas Isn't:

1. A holiday that everyone celebrates

2. The only holiday in December

3. The only "real" holiday in December (just for clarification)

4. About making people feel bad

5. An excuse to pressure corporations to do what you want

6. A reason to accost people in the subway with signs like "Jesus or Hell" while wishing them a Merry Christmas

7. A political tool

8. Under attack

9. A war to be waged

10. About presents

Guess what else? If you're so concerned about the religious meaning of the holiday, then you should pay special attention to item number 10 above. In light of that, you should not be threatening retailers with not spending your holiday shopping dollars there if they don't say "Merry Christmas" to you, because in fact, you should be going to church and giving your money to the poor if anyone, and not buying materialistic things. So if you can't make that kind of change in your life then you can shut the hell up because nobody else wants to listen to your hyprocritical nonsense.

Seriously, you really suck.

For many, many, many, many, many reasons. Really. Shut up.

See my previous post. Case in point, my brother's genius roommate stole Dan's checkbook and made a check out to himself then went to his bank and cashed it. Then kept living there. Um, pretty sure you're going to get busted for that one, genius.

Lucky for Dan and his other (sane) roommate, this guy is kicked out now and the locks changed.

Dan, you'll have to do a criminal background check from now on I'm afraid.

I'm tired of you and judging by what's going on in the world and in this city, so is most everyone else.

Today they are demanding that Catholic charities stop brokering all adoptions unless they agree to stop helping with adoptions for same-sex couples. Now you could give them credit for actually sticking with what they say their beliefs are, or you could just remember that the Catholic church is basically evil and should stop telling everyone what to do.

Don't point out the splinter in my eye until you take the log out of your own, Mr. Pope.

Apparently Saddam Hussein declared in the courtroom today/yesterday that he would not return to an "unjust" courtroom the next day and that he had been deprived of a shower and clean clothes, which he called "terrorism". That is a very interesting definition.

I don't think he should be tortured or even deprived of a shower really but I just think it's funny that he's so outraged about such a small thing and actually thinks it's OK to call it terrorism.

This is a picture Rob took from the Cambridge side of the Charles River a couple of years ago the day of the Head of the Charles regatta. The cranes to the right may be associated with the redevelopment of Charles River Plaza which we live just up the street from now. Funny.

This is from Billy's 7th birthday, according to the folder it's in. (He's 10 now.) Apparently he was worn out from all the celebrating.

This is my old road in Doylestown, OH where I went to high school.

This is just so sad.

Can someone point me to actual scientific data showing that there are lower crime rates in states that have a death penalty? Because that's what all the idiots on "the hill" who are pushing for it to be reinstated in Massachusetts are claiming, but I don't know what the hell they're basing it on. Here's a clue folks: criminals aren't usually all that swift. If they were they would have figured out a way not to live a life of crime.

Here's a photo Rob took near South Station a couple of years ago when I worked down on Summer Street. I like the crazy group of buildings in the picture.

Can you believe a year has gone by since Arafat died? That still seems like recent news to me.

I finished Suzanne's scarf. Take a look.

Finished scarf

Scarf detail

Here's my brother dressed as Luigi for Halloween. Nice.

Now Brian, please get rid of the creepy mustache.

Here's a random picture of Heather and Billy in Charlestown in January of 2003. I really want us to get pictures organized and online, so to inspire us I'm going to try to post pictures fairly often. I just thought this was a funny picture.

How ridiculous is it that the only reason I know there are riots in Paris is because I saw something about it on a Spanish channel on TV in a takeout restaurant the other day, and because they talked about it on NPR. I don't see anything in the papers about it around here and the local news had not a word to say about it.

Another reason the local news sucks.

Anyway, but this is my favorite - this is what sparked the riots:

The riots began after two youths of North African descent were electrocuted when they hid in an electric power station, believing they were being followed by police.

Since when is it the government's fault that you decided to hide in an electric power station?

France seems to have some major issues.

Oh, there's nothing I love more than a big dumb dummy trying to reassure the public that we aren't going to die in a pandemic of avian flu.

"Come on, people, even if it did come to our country, it's a bird disease. Relax."

I'm paraphrasing but that's basically what he said.

I just heard someone on the radio talking about how the next generation (ie: younger than me, I don't know what that is... Generation Next or something stupid?) is concerned that they will be the first generation in the US to inherit a worse life than their parents had.

Whoa kids, I think my generation has that covered. The cost of living is way higher for us than for our parents' generation, it's almost impossible to support a family without 2 parents working. Hey, it's almost impossible just to support 2 adults without any kids on just one salary.

Note to the next generation: you're totally screwed.

My baby brother Brian dressed as a Mario Brother for Halloween. It is deeply disturbing. I'll post the photo here later but at the moment I can't access it because I'm at work.

Oh, Brian. You're so special.

Eat lots of candy! Don't egg anybody!

Here's me in costume at work.

Is it just me, or is this a little ridiculous? Instead of cancelling holidays, especially very secular ones like Halloween, why not celebrate more of them and let kids learn about different cultures? Of course the woman who says something like, "What about Columbus Day or Valentine's Day?" is stupid. It's like comparing apples and oranges. Kids don't care about Columbus Day, it's just a day off of school and doesn't have any religious implications of any sort. Valentine's Day isn't anything compared to Halloween for a kid either.

This is, as my friend Sheilagh put it, HIGH-LAR-I-OUS.

I'm just about to finish up a pretty, fuzzy, fluffy mohair scarf for my friend Suzanne. Now that I've switched to the continental/European way to hold the yarn and knit, it's going much faster.

Check out photos at my flicker site here and here.

I'm using Ingenue yarn by Katia and size 13US/9.0mm needles.

I love NPR. And I love my little Tivoli radio Rob bought me last year for my birthday. It lets me listen to NPR all day at my desk.

Here are some interesting stories I've heard lately:

Ex-Mormons forming their own communities because they're shunned by their former church and its members.

Two political women, one Democrat, one Republican, talk about how women are quietly taking over a lot of power in the US. It's about time. I think it's kind of funny. Phyllis Schlafley, kiss my ass.

Why does Hollywood fake politics so badly?

The correlation between how many Fedex packages are shipped in a day and how the US economy is doing.

Musical guest is Sheryl Crowe. How did that go?

"We'll only take Sheryl Crowe if Lance hosts."

Something like that?

Just heard a funny interview on NPR with George Carlin. He was talking about how he used to do some routine called "The Secret News" and he listed some of the topics that he listed in his fake news report, as if they were headlines:

• Everybody is Scared

• No One Knows What They're Doing

• At Least One of Your Children Will Disappoint You

• Everyone is Dressed Improperly

• Your House Will Never Be Perfectly Clean

It's like the stuff you secretly suspect is true but no one will admit. Everybody's house is a mess, no one has a plan, etc. Pretty funny.

Hey, look at this cool idea from Bank of America. I know lots of people hate B of A because it's basically taking over the country and will be the only bank or something, but I haven't had any complaints so far about them since I've banked with them. And Rob's banked with them for years exclusively online until they took over Fleet so now we have branches here. Anyway, I think this is a good idea. It's just like saving up your change in a jar, but easier.

Amazing Race is one of our favorite shows. It's fun because they send these people all over the world and you get to see people act like total idiots and make fools of themselves in other countries. I'm sure it's not doing wonders for the image Americans have in general, but still, it's good entertainment. There's always some team to really hate because they're just horribly whiney and awful, or they scream all the time at each other, etc.

But Amazing Race Family Edition sucks. First of all, it's taking till the 4th or 5th episode for them to even get out of the country, and they spent the first part driving around to stupid crap in the southern US. A couple things I'll say OK to like they went to the space center in Alabama. But they also went to the "World's Biggest Office Chair" somewhere else in Alabama, and also mobile home sales company somewhere either in Alabama or Louisiana.

I mean, if you're sticking to the US for some reason, can you at least see some good sights? Like what about the Grand Canyon? Or Niagara Falls or the Rockies or something? Alaska, hey, that's cool. But having pit stops at places like a random BP station off a rural route in Alabama is more than a little lame. I mean, did they run out of money for the show or something? I can't figure it out.

Plus, it's horrible watching these families. Almost every one of them is perfectly awful.

Then there's the Jesus freaks from Florida, the widow and 3 kids whose husband/father died somehow at an auto racing track or event. First of all, don't feel too sorry for them, because they're awful people. The woman thinks she is on some kind of mission to save her kids because their dad died, and they pray almost every 5 minutes about everything. I don't think you're supposed to pray for material things, at least that's what I'd learned, but these stupid people are constantly asking Jesus to please help them win the race. Well, the prize for the race is a million dollars. Oops.

I can't even remember all the upsetting, awful things this family has said and done, especially the mom, but the two girls are whiney brats, someone needs to tell them to stop dressing like skanks and plucking their eyebrows to one-hair's-breadth, and that skunk stripes in the hair went out of style about 8 years ago (not that they ever should have been in style).

But the absolute topper that almost made my head explode this week, was when they got to Lake Pontchartrain in Louisiana (this was filmed before the hurricane obviously) and one of the stupid kids in this stupid family commented on how big it was, and the mom said, "Yes, it's one of the five great lakes."

Hey, idiot, it's like 1/100th the size of the smallest great lake, and you're from Florida which is right next-door. How is it that you think one of the great lakes is in your neighborhood? What would even prompt you to say that? I mean, it's not like you learned it in school, so why are you volunteering the information? You just think any lake that's big is a great lake? I'd like her to list the other four. Let me guess her list:

• Lake Okeechobee

• Lake Kissimmee

• Lake Placid

• Lake Tahoe

Shut your mouth, you stupid woman! Your kids might still have a tiny chance of not being complete morons if you can just stop telling them things, because everything you tell them is wrong!

You might think TV is a dumb thing to get upset about but the reason I'm upset is that these are real people and this is what I have to run into in my daily life. People who are this horrible and dumb.

Happy Birthday, Heather!

Friday is Heather's birthday, but do you think she is putting a list of demands on her site like in previous years? No, she's not.

How are all her fans supposed to shower her with gifts?

This is crazy! Who knew? Well, I guess these guys did. And to prove they were right, one of them drank a sample of the bacteria to give himself an ulcer. Now that's really being dedicated to science.

Oops. I guess she did a pretty good job of learning the lyrics then, huh?

It seems she dropped out of school in 9th grade. OK, but how did she get that far without being able to read? What is wrong with our education system? How can you take tests in school without reading? I don't get it.

This is a little creepy.

We saw Serenity this afternoon. Good movie! I've only seen part of the original series but we're watching it now because they're re-broadcasting it. Anyway, it was good even if you don't know the series at all, but I think fans won't be disappointed either. Hallelujah, a movie that's actually decent. It's a miracle.

In case you want to vote in a poll about your period, go visit Heather's site.

No no no no no. No no. NO.

This is my favorite part:

“This case is about free inquiry in education, not about a religious agenda,” said Patrick Gillen of the Thomas More Law Center in Ann Arbor, Mich., in his opening statement. The center, which lobbies for what it sees as the religious freedom of Christians, is defending the school district.

No, it's not religious at all. Except that it's about God.

People suck. Read the Bill of Rights again please everyone.

Wait, I revise my earlier statement. This is actually my favorite part, really:

He also challenged the accuracy of “Of Pandas and People,” the intelligent-design textbook to which Dover students are referred.

Miller said the book omits discussion of what causes extinction. Since nearly all original species are extinct, he said, any intelligent design creator would not have been very intelligent.

Ha ha ha. That makes me laugh.

OK, a while ago, like at least a month ago, I was handed this pamphlet on the street by a man who rifled through a pile of quite a variety of them before finding the one he must have decided was just perfect for me. Now generally I just take little hand-outs from people unless they're holding a sign that says something like "Jesus or Hell" (and there is a man who wears a sandwich board saying that who frequents crowded areas and events in Boston) because what's the point of arguing with them or not taking their coupon for 50% off pizza or whatever it is. However, after I was handed this, I almost turned around and walked back to tell the guy off. Since I didn't, I now have to rant about it here.

I'd like to say I will try to have some kind of intelligent counterpoint to offer but really, I think it will just be ranting and raving. In order for you to fully understand what is so upsetting about it, I need to quote the entire pamphlet to you. And just so you know, it is a publication of the Board of the Eastern Pennsylvania Mennonite Church. Come on, Mennonites, you're my peeps, I grew up around you. I'm kind of annoyed that you're in Boston having random men in disguise hand out upsetting pamphlets to strangers condemning their lifestyle.

Click below for the rest of the story.

Read the rest

Oh good. Now we're going to replace National Parks and monuments with malls? I guess those are our real national monuments, aren't they?

Seriously, someone tell me, what's the best country for me to move to? I need it to be pretty easy to get permission to live there and it wouldn't hurt my ignorant self if at least kind of a lot of people spoke English. I'm willing to learn but right now I'm far from fluent in any other language.

Where should I go? Canada? I hear Vancouver is very nice. Ireland? France? Japan? Switzerland? The Netherlands? Hey, I'm half Italian, maybe they'll let me in.

Honestly, what is this country doing? Doesn't anybody care? It's embarrassing.

I just walked into a wall at my office and gave myself a bloody nose. No, I'm not joking. I have witnesses. What the hell is wrong with you, you might ask? I have no idea. I am at the reception desk while Melissa is at lunch and we have a new wireless headset. I had gotten up to tell someone he needed to move his car in the parking garage, and then I promptly turned directly into a wall. I was so shocked that I just kept walking, with him calling after me, "Are you OK?" I then of course put my hand to my nose and discovered it was bleeding. I went to the bathroom to check it out and discovered that I had a little tiny cut on the bridge of my nose, and what looks like it will be a nice bruise, and one nostril was bleeding profusely. Nothing appears to be broken... good thing I have a nice strong Italian nose, haha.

And it appears to be slowing down now, so I'm not worried about bleeding to death from my nose. But I am starting to get a bit of a headache, although the bridge of my nose seems to be in tact so I still think it's not broken or anything.

But really, I mean, people have teased me about being klutzy before but this takes the cake. I wasn't disoriented or dizzy or anything, I just forgot where the wall was and turned my face right into it. SMOOTH.

Here's a photo for your enjoyment, though what I actually should have photographed was the pile of bloody tissues in the garbage. Nice.

It is so painful to me that people continue to have this conversation. Not just a conversation, but court cases. There is some school district (well there's more than one, but one specific one just mentioned on the news) that is being sued by 6 parents and the ACLU because they are requiring that so-called "intelligent design" be taught alongside evolution in their public schools. The theory is that the universe is too complex to exist without some intelligence behind it.

Let me review for you:

1. First of all, nobody cares what you think, it's mixing religion to teach kids as fact in school that there is a diety controlling the universe. Sorry, whatever you believe, that's true.

2. Secondly, it only seems to people who can't get over themselves that we're so important that there must be someone intelligent controlling every miniscule detail of our existence.

Even if you are someone who believes in God in one form or another, you really should be able to grasp the concept that it's a big universe, that we're not the most important things in it, and that we only think we are because we are us. Get it? It really hurts my brain to think that people are so impressed with themselves. Look around guys, we're not that great.

No not medically, mentally. I am to the point already in my life, and I'm only 29, where there's very little that I actually care about anymore. I've narrowed my focus down so much to what I care about that it encompasses very few things and people. And even for the things I'm supposed to care about I don't do a very good job of showing it.

If you want to read more about what's wrong with me, click below.

Read the rest

Wow, it's been too long since I posted to this category. I'll try to be better. Because I know have lots of people who are big fans of my knitting out there. I have to keep my public happy. Ha ha.

Anyway, here is a baby blanket I'm working on for Heather's niece, Ella.

I'm using Pashmina yarn for the pink, and the cream is Cashmerino. It's sooooo soft. I'd love to make myself something with it, but an adult sized anything would cost hundreds just for the yarn. Maybe I could manage a scarf or a hat at some point.

Anyway, I'm using seed and souble-seed stitch. It's on circular needles and it's going pretty well but it's taking a long time. I'm late making it so I'm trying to finish up so I can get it to Heather while she's in Florida visiting Ella.

And she's off. Now while I don't think it's OK that people like Martha Stewart get to go to nice-y suburban prison "camps" rather than real prisons, like the one Lil' Kim was apparently assigned to, I don't think the solution is that she should get to go to a fancy prison too, I think the solution is no fancy prisons. Oops, sorry, maybe if you're a celebrity and you think you'd be in some kind of "special" danger in prison, then you should avoid getting sent there by not doing illegal things. Just a little tip from me to you.

And by the way, this is quite a life she has. There's a rival rap group? They have a shootout over a song? Why did it take her this long to get sent to prison?

In case you forgot how stupid this guy is, check this out. What an idiot! I guess this proves that you definitely don't have to be smart to win that show, you just have to be an asshole.